I'm trying to find a place in this world.

Cause i'm lost, confused, && I missed my way to your heart.

Hey bloggiee, I'm going to have tuition soon and seriously, days havent been great since he left for Thailand and yesterday night, we argued. All because of me. I'm the one who started it because I seroiusly cant take this anymore. I dont have such patience waiting for him minutes and hours! its killing me okayy? Eveytime, he's the one who would say, i talk to you later or bla bla bla or he's busy. Those fucking reasons he give which I dont know even if its true even he said so. WTF? Fucking hate this kind of things when it actually happen.

Why cant you just send me a message everytime when you have the time to go to the toilet or something? Dont tell me you dont even have a sec to send me a message and tell me how much you love and miss me? Dont tell me you dont even have a sec to call me and just say those 3 important words? Dont tell me you cant stay up longer just to have a longer talk to me? Please, this things is just so easy to be done and you dont even know. Its like even if you're having dinner, you spend a sec to send me a message saying you're having your dinner?

Thankyou so much for not doing any of this that I have just listed. You wasnt like this at all when you went to Thailand for the one before this. You wasnt like this at all! You're so much more loving and you care about me much more than you do this time. Thankyou so much for making me lose my mind, confused and making me moody all this time since you're away. Thankyou so much. I hate you, I hate you so much! I hate you treating me like this. Why cant you be better. Even a friend of mine who's busy, still will reply my msgs to cheer me up. You lost to just a normal friend of mine! And worst, you're not just a friend, you're my boyfriend?!

So today have been boring. Woke up only around 1pm and seriously, I had a bad stomach ache once I woke up. I stand up and i felt dizzy. Feel like fainting and I feel like the world is turning real fast untill I cant even balance myself. After cleaning myself. Ask for food and food sucks so I didnt bother to eat. Hunger and sickness surround me till I have tuition. Before tuition, I was bored... So i went editing pictures. And now, I just finish my tuiton and I'm feeling moody already. I have no idea why. I think its because he's acting like that.

I dont know how to describe my feeling right now. Its like, he never will understand me at all. And its like, he is merajuking at the same bloody time. I tell you, even if you read this post, dont ask me to delete this because I really have no way to express my anger but this. Dont ask me to please! I write whatever i want to write so dont control me in writing anything i my post. Weather you like it or not, its still MY blog. And everything is written by ME and its from my mind, heart and soul.

Thanks for treating me like this. I have seroiusly no idea what to say. We havent break up, and I felt like we have. So yeahh, I will not talk to you untill you get me back again. I wont be nice to you untill you treat me nicer. And please, I want some freedom. Thinking about those fun that i would have without you. I really regret not going. Everyone had so much of fun but not me all because of you? So please, dont control me and dont be so sensitive. Even how wild and playful I can be, I still love you okay? So please, stop controlling me.

END OF POST!

shows the real me. (:

Spent hours on this. (:

The back. (:

My edited picture. (:

Sorry if i'm mean, this is the real me. (: